Reader question: It seems that everyone has caught on to networking. I can almost feel people cringe when I ask them if they know someone who can help me find a job. With so many people on the market and everyone networking, how can you still network without annoying your contacts?

Don’t ask for a job or imply anything close when you network. It puts the person on the defensive. It’s intrusive. It’s annoying.

But absolutely keep networking. Networking is critical to the jobseeker. Most jobs are filled via referrals, not ads. Getting inside is especially important in this slow economy, when companies are cutting recruiting costs. Here are some tips to network without being annoying:

Make a reasonable case for why you are networking. I recruited for a firm that only placed senior strategy consultants. We received countless inquiries from people with no background or interest in consulting. Do your homework, and only ask for things that are relevant to the people you approach.

If you approach someone repeatedly, say something different each time. Your first approach might be an informational interview. Your second approach might be a personalized thank you for the interview. Your third approach might be an interesting insight about what you discussed. Each time, new information is shared.

Use the information you are collecting. In the above example, information gleaned from the first interview is useful at least two more times. It is also useful when networking with other people in the field. You appear knowledgeable about the industry when you share insights from one insider with others.

Remember to maintain the network. When your search is over, circle back to the people who helped you along the way. Get into the habit of not only calling people for help, but of building genuine relationships.