Picking up on an earlier theme of mine – the power of networking, I have lately been struck by just how impactful this “art of building a network” can be and how many of us take it for granted and, dare I say, poopoo it. Indulge me to share with you networking in practice: when my family moved to California, we visited potential schools and were fortunate to meet one of the Principals. She gave us the name of an experienced realtor in town whose children had attended the school. We engaged him to find our house and gladly became friends with him and his wife. Upon learning that we needed to change our wills because of California’s probate system, and not knowing any vendors, contractors, service providers, anything, we came to rely on our realtor for contacts. He put us in touch with an attorney (who has become a personal friend, too). She worked for a small firm and I became friendly with the founder – both of us being ambitious, energetic and like-minded women in many ways. I happened to mention to her one day that my daughter was struggling in school. (Kindergarten, to be exact. Anyone who has children, and lives in an affluent town with a great public school system can empathize!) She gave me the name of an educational therapist who works with her daughter, and I promptly enrolled my daughter. After a few months, the therapist (who is also now a good friend of mine – are you getting the picture?), recommended that we have our daughter tested for all the learning disabilities. After concluding that nothing was materially wrong, the psychologist who did the testing suggested that we have our daughter’s thyroid tested as hormonal levels can impact memory and concentration. Lo and behold, our (then) 6-year old has hypothyroidism – a rarity in young children but nevertheless a possibility. We would have not discovered it for a long time if we hadn’t asked, if we hadn’t reached out and met people, if we hadn’t networked!

So, what does this all mean to you? Women are highly-skilled at social networking. You would have gone down a similar path as I did for your child, right? We aren’t as good about translating those skills into business and for professional purposes. (Ref. WINningView “What’s in Your Network”) But, there is no reason we can’t start! We have recently learned from Keith Ferrazzi’s book, Never Eat Alone, that building authenticity is a critical success factor. We do this by finding common ground (however small that might be), letting our guard down, sharing fears and vulnerabilities, discussing challenges and being clear about dreams, aspirations and interests. Aren’t these all topics of conversation that we have on a social level? Relationship selling and professional development include getting to this more intimate level to build trust and credibility and likeability and commonality.

While building relationships and a network are important to the sales process, as Keith Ferrazzi points out, I would like to focus on its immeasurable value to professional development. We know from articles that the majority of job positions are secured through connections, not in the open market. Research also indicates that the majority of people believe that “who you know” is more important in getting ahead than “what you know.” Certainly, a strong factor in career advancement is about the knowledge you bring to clients, but the reality is about the relationships that you have forged in providing that service, becoming a trusted advisor to them and their loyalty and recommendations for you, in return. Finally, having executive champions who know your work product and can “vouch” for you are invaluable. What do you need to turn the web of people you know into a formidable network?

First, map out your network. This is an exercise that seems wasteful… until you do it. When you get down to it, this process will astonish you. Putting it on paper will not only reveal to you how many people are in your network – professionals, colleagues, friends, family, influences – and how vast it is, but also how inter-connected it is. This brings me to next point.

Develop, foster and connect your network when times are good. Keep in touch periodically when you desire nothing of people. How often you reach out and contact people will depend on the degrees of priority, but never forget that the least connected person in your network might be the one person you come to rely on down the road to help in a job search, put in a good word for your child trying to get into a college, introduce you to a prospect that you have been dying to meet, pave the way for you to get involved in a committee of interest. It is equally important to find common things of interest among those in your network and introduce them to each other. Networking is not for people who hoard information! Pay a favor forward, not necessarily always back. Give someone a boost at a time when you want nothing in return. Recent research indicated that women, in particular, struggle with this kind of indirect pay-back. We have been raised to give immediate gratitude. When you go to a friend’s house, you bring something. When someone gives you a gift, you write a thank you note… immediately… or buy a little something in return! When your child has a birthday party, you give goody-bags to thank the guest for their presents and for coming. I am not suggesting that we should not be appreciative, expressing thanks is good manners. However, cultivating a strong web of a network means that you will do these things, plus think big-picture about how one benefit might be bestowed on someone else simultaneously, without expectation for pay-back.

Thirdly, form your own board of directors. The idea of a core group of people will take you beyond just one-on-one mentorship. Why would you want to have this? Particularly in today’s economic uncertainty, we need to be thinking ahead and we need to have a deep understanding of what our core value proposition is so that we can chart our path, ensure we stay on that path and build our personal brand. Subha Barry knows. She was the Chief Diversity Officer for Merrill Lynch, in charge of putting together some of the most state-of-the-art talent development programming around. Then, Bank of America came along and shortly thereafter she found herself out of a job. Having had a group of career advisors previously in her career, she immediately went to work to form her own personal advisory board – a group of people, not necessarily all friends, but people who were thoughtful and seasoned and secure enough to point out her areas needing improvement and decipher her strongest interests. They were people in her network from all walks of life whom she trusted and were able to articulate her assets and advocate her cause. She had several discussions (some as a group, some individually) with this handful of trusted advisors and was able to learn about the characteristics she would want for her next position and weed out what she would not enjoy. Now, they are championing her and connecting her to opportunities that align with her findings. As Subha said, “it helped to look at my situation differently and find non-linear steps in my career progression.” Subha’s tips for bringing a personal advisory board together: first and foremost, have a clear purpose so that the board is aligned with your goals. Secondly, be true to yourself and present your authentic self so that you deliver a consistent message about your skills, thereby establishing your own personal brand.

Networking comes in all shapes and sizes and can be all-encompassing, based on online connectivity, social gatherings, professional alignment, memberships, common interests and hobbies, clubs, mentorship. In order to maximize your own potential, it absolutely needs to be part of your life and it needs to be cultivated. Everyone agrees: you get back ten-fold what you put into it, so it is worth the investment in time and energy.