I was recently invited to conduct a Myers Briggs workshop for a large lawfirm. And the objective of the workshop was to understand how to better manage our communication styles when interacting with clients and our teams. Heady but important stuff, in this climate, right? Right. Or so I thought. The presentation went off well, but left me with some afterthoughts that I thought I would share.

All careers have obstacles we anticipate and ones we don’t. And this presentation was no different. My biggest obstacle in giving this presentation was not the 800 lb partners in the room, or the skepticism toward coaches, nor the apprehension that suddenly passed through everyone’s face when hearing that I was a lawyer and a psychotherapist. (that one I’ve grown used to).

The thing that sent an arctic chilling and that created a layer of thin frost on the 20 foot board room table was…wait for it….the was the word: FEELING.

According to the MBTI— a person makes decisions either by THINKING or FEELING. There was nothing I could do about that word. Or its pairing. The word FEELING has been used for years and this room of brilliant, successful savvy, partners, way up in sky of one of NY’s landmark buildings….were ready for a modern day showdown. And I was the sherriff. And you know what always happens to the sherriff…

So I said the dirty word FEELING to my room of partners. The got room really really quiet. Each one was wrestling with the word and its obscene presence in their board room. I then said “ok..I know I said a dirty word, so its still not too late for some of you to walk out on me and this presentation.” The room rippled with a small, quiet refined, knowing chuckle….FEELING was in their board room, highnoon had arrived in the form on a coach/consultant and the showdown was about to begin. Their posture: Bring it on. My posture: Bring it on. FEELING & THINKING was in the board room, all in the interest of better understanding and managing teams and client expectations. And the sherriff lived to tell this tale.

So, what’s the point in my telling you all this? The point is that FEELING has an important place at the corporate and lawfirm table. Decision makers that are FEELING types are navigated by firm values, team culture, a consideration of client core beliefs & values and the ultimate impact on their client’s vision for themselves, their constituents and their company. They are not wimps. They are the leaders that we will need to step up, be heard and take control in the wake of some of the UNFEELING decisions that were made and which contributed to our present economic climate.

So…like I said. I talked dirty in the board room. And they liked it. We talked about FEELING personality types and how to identify FEELING types so you can navigate expectations, decipher clients’ seemingly cryptic communications and thereby manage your firm and your clients efficiently.

All very important things. They left feeling more aware of their managment styles. And I left feeling greatful & honored to be the messenger that dodged a bullet and lived to coach another day.