This week’s post is the first in a series that speaks to new ways of being in our corporate settings. This information is derived from the many old Indigenous People’s Ways, and I share them with deep respect for these Ways. All of these systems and approaches are designed to bring about harmony and balance, particularly in communities that are in dscord and disruption.

Sounds like the job arena to me, how about you?

The Talking Stick Ceremony. Here is a “hypothetical” situation. A very toxic division is stymied by discord, the individuals have long since stopped respecting each other, and in fact, now engage in subtle and not so subtle sabotage of each other and the community as a whole. Everyone points the finger elsewhere. Everyone is to blame. Everyone is judged.

I’ve searched the Harvard Business Review backlogs, my own case work from Columbia Business School and my clinical psychology work from Johns Hopkins, to no avail. Although I am finding this a more and more common problem for CEO’s to resolve, no body of work or research addresses this lack of engagement and open warfare.

Is this team lost?

The Talking Stick Ceremony is an old Native Way of bringing harmony and balance back into the Center. If some fall-out has occurred, any member of the community can grab the Talking Stick and request a ceremony. A few comments here about the stick itself.

It is usually quite beautiful. Made from the strongest piece of wood, and generally decorated with all the elements of the the natural world: a crystal, a piece of animal hide, perhaps some beading, usually carved. The stick itself is always placed on the West wall (and there are many reasons for this) of a dwelling or gathering place (or conference room) and low enough so the smallest person can reach it and request a Talking Stick Ceremony. (Because children have concerns and challenges too!)

And the ceremony goes like this. The person requesting the cermeony goes first, holding the stick with reverence. Once that person feels they are complete, they hand the stick to the other person, who MUST now summarize what the person just said. All of it. No shortcuts, no emotional outbursts, no editing or embellishing. To the Indigenous Way of thinking, a human being can not plan an argument and summarize what another has said, all at the same time!

It is for this reason, that at least one other person, the Medicine Person of the Tribe usually, (or a consultant like me who has been trained in this), and or other members of the community, are present. The person summarizing must do a thorough and complete job and the listeners will let him or her know if they feel they did do that. At this point the person who just summarized can proceed to expressing his or her viewpoint and feelings, and the Talking Stick is passed back to the first person for summary.

Seems simple. In reality, getting people to sit still long enough, to listen and be silent, and to understand and accept themselves and others is supremely difficult. It takes patience and practice, and the consultant (or Medicine Person) must be consistent and constant. Clarity is paramount as is unconditional acceptance of all the participants.

Does it work? You bet. Better than anything I’ve ever seen. The catch here is whether or not the CEO and management leaders are willing to be transparent, allow a process to unfold that they can not control, and let the learnings teach the whole community. Scary stuff! And not what we generally learn in Business School as the command and control-protection-from-litigation-at-all costs methodology of management.

One final note: having participated in this process myself, I can only say that it takes a healthy confident sense of self to sit in front of your peers and hear difficult things about yourself and then have to say them outloud. The reward comes not because these things are either found true or not, it comes when each indiividual and the whole community still accepts and embraces each participant. It is irrelevant in this process if someone’s personality is mean spirited, or prone to anger or to take advantage of another for their own gain.

There is no judgment.

Embracing who you really are is all that matters to the community, because the community already knows you are doing the best you can you with what you have. And, you belong to the community. And they belong with you and need you, they need your unique talents and skills in whatever package that comes in.

How about that for an afternoon seminar?