Success in a Man’s World Sophia Matveeva

Success in a Man’s World

September 15 2011

On Thursday 8 September I chaired a panel discussion of “Success in a Man’s World” for the London Chapter of 85 Broads. I have not yet reached the dizzy heights from which I can dispense my own advice on the subject, but I found myself in the lucky position where I could ask about the subjects that make me curious. Since then, I have been inundated with comments from the audience saying how useful the event was and have decided to share the advice that our panel gave us with all my readers.

The key points that came out of our discussion were: be “corporately canny”, be true to yourself and work hard. While our panel was unanimous in saying that there are no short cuts and hard work is a necessary ingredient to success; they also gave us some very useful advice on how to better navigate the corporate landscape.

Remuneration and appraisals

An appraisal should not be a surprise for either you or your boss. Work is a continuing dialogue, where you are constantly being assessed and assessing your employer. An appraisal should not be the only time you show how wonderful you are to a surprised audience.
Be prepared. It is easy for both parties to forget the work you did if it was done nearly a year ago. Note down your achievements and judge yourself against benchmarks. One of the panellists suggested setting your own benchmarks, if there are no official targets for you to measure yourself against.
Use evidence and don’t get emotional. If you present irrefutable evidence of your achievements and handle any salary discussions like a business negotiation, your chances of getting what you want will increase.
Name a number. One panellist said that men are much more likely to name a desired salary/bonus amount than women. I quote “I know it feels uncomfortable to name a number, so practice it at home until you can say it.”
Be aware of the market. Read salary surveys, talk to head hunters regularly, even if you are not thinking of leaving. You need to be informed of where your job market is heading.
Be clear in your goals. This does not only relate to financial goals. Think about your career development.

Networking

Events. Here we had opposing views from a couple of our panellists - one discussant said that events with your contacts are part of your job and whether you enjoy them or not is irrelevant. Another panellist suggested that you should organise events around topics that interest you, because that is where you can be at your best.
Build alternative informal networks. It can be difficult for women to break into informal networks, like those built around golf days or poker. It is therefore important to build your own. One panellist remembered that in the 1980s women in her workplace used to congregate in the ladies bathroom. Thankfully now we have other outlets, 85 Broads being a prime example.
Prepare for events. Research the people who are going to attend the event and identify those whom you want to approach. If you find out what issues are likely to be on the minds of people relevant to you, you will make a good impression (and the fact that you do not know the off side rule will not matter.)
Make male friends at work. See this as part of your informal networking (as well as a way to enlarge your circle of friends and make the office a better place to be!)

Image

Be comfortable and true to yourself. If you are uncomfortable (either physically or mentally), it will show. If you have always enjoyed dressing up and wearing make-up, then do so. If your style is simple, then stick to it.
Be appropriate and judge your environment. While you must be comfortable with yourself, you must also fit in with your environment. If you work in a very corporate office, adjust your look accordingly. This does not mean that you should wear suits every day – elegant dresses and chic kitten heels can be just as effective. A great tip one of the panellists gave was “look at what the senior women are wearing and take their lead.”
Get the basics right. While a weekly manicure and a daily blow dry are not required, make sure to tick the basic boxes: fresh smell, clean nails, tidy hair, appropriate well-kept clothes.

Bad behaviour

Be canny and use your judgement. It is likely that throughout your careers you will come across sexism or inappropriate behaviour. While there are official avenues to follow, this is not always a good idea. Sometimes you need to laugh it off or have an informal conversation with a superior.
Stay sane. Unfortunately these things happen even in the most unlikely circumstances involving the most unlikely characters. Don’t lose your sanity and let somebody else’s lack of judgement derail you – if your current organisation is not supportive, you will find one that is.
Sometimes you just have to leave. If something inappropriate happens and your company is not supporting you, then it is not the kind of company you should be working for. It’s time to move on and find a better option.
Take action. If something genuinely bad happens, report it.

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Tags: 85 Broads, career, women, networking, leadership, 85 Broads clubs, Special Guest

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